- The Credit Crisis Disrobed
Nobody in their right state of mind would loan money to someone who had zilch-point-nada chance of making the payments (11/15/2008)
- A Farmer's Guide to The 2008 Election
Well, righteous citizens, you probably haven’t noticed, but there seems to be a major election coming up soon. (10/4/2008)
- I Could Be Dead by Then
I read somewhere that age 50 is the new 40. OK, although I’m not exactly clear why the “old” 40 needed updating, let’s assume this is a good thing. Using this line of thought, I now have decided that 60 is the new 59. (8/27/2008)
- John’s World: Are Too. Are Not.
I want to talk to all you married folks out there for a minute. Or those of you who could be married if you’d just give up hope and settle. You know who you are. (5/16/2008)
- John’s World: How to Visit Denmark
Somewhere around the year 1000, my English ancestors were living wretched medieval lives in what would eventually become northern Britain. (3/14/2008)
- John’s World: Measure Twice, Cuss Once
I am proud to call myself a woodworker—a person who likes to use expensive tools to turn costly lumber into sawdust. (2/2/2008)
- John’s World: You Light Up My Lawn
Time has a perverse sense of humor. It likes to mess with our minds by bending them into positions we found loathsome just years before. Yet another reason not to write stuff down. (12/17/2007)
- John’s World: Something is Rotten
In the state of Illinois, something has gone seriously bad. No, no-not just the government or cell phone coverage, although those are good guesses. (11/20/2007)
- John’s World: Shopping With Sam
Contrary to folklore, farmers do not like to shop. Not for stuff you can carry home in a wispy sack, though. (11/2/2007)
- John’s World: Excuses for the 21st Century
Today's farmer isn't going to be able to compete using tools from the past. I mean you wouldn't be caught dead carrying a bag phone, right? (8/31/2007)
- John’s World: Air Force None
I have done some rough calculations, and, by my estimates, 92% of the fun of commercial flying has been extracted by people who charge me for the right to keep doing it. (3/30/2007)
- John's World: 34-40 or Fight
This is the winter of our discontent and discomfort...because our pants are too tight. I'm pretty sure it’s not our fault, either. (3/16/2007)
- John’s World: if u cn rd ths
You’re doing better than me. Despite still having several dozen working brain cells, I’ve become semiliterate. I mean, if literacy is defined as being able to read and write, what’s your status when you can’t write? (2/16/2007)
- John’s World: Another Valentine’s Massacre
When it comes to affairs of the heart, I am about as useful as a proctologist. It is not that I am unromantic—gosh, no. I’ve even seen a Meg Ryan film. It is just that some individuals get emotional about love. (2/2/2007)
- John's World: A Cereal Killing
(1/12/2007)
- John's World: Can You Hear Me Now?
We are all seekers. Many of us search for fame and fortune. Some seek peace and harmony. (12/8/2006)
- John’s World: I’ll Stick With an Apple a Day
There comes a moment in time in every man’s life when he has to look deep inside himself and see what’s really there. It’s called a colonoscopy, and apparently it’s legal in many states. (11/3/2006)
- John's World: Ultimate Grilling
Prometheus stole fire from the gods and gave it to humans, according to early Greek media. He was caught, of course, and given the harshest punishment: He was chained to a rock, and he had his liver torn out every night by a large bird. It’s pretty much the same sensation as having lunch at Taco Diablo every day. (9/1/2006)
- John's World: A Farmer Father’s Day
Fillmore P. Hallmark, the inventor of Mother’s Day, once remarked, “Father’s Day is just like Arbor Day, but without the excitement.” Not really, but he could have. (5/13/2006)
- John’s World: Best If Read By April 2006
Just what a world full of target dates, deadlines and milestones needed: expiration dates. Now we have in-your-face proof of the decline and fall of civilization—labels that clearly, even proudly, point out a day of doom, urging us to get with it. (3/19/2006)
- John’s World: Bin There, Built That
Next to golf clubs and new babies, there are fewer more deceptive packages than an unassembled grain bin. (3/8/2006)
- John’s World: Take My Identity...Please
I lurched into the kitchen as the winter wind whined through the garage doors. My mind began guessing the main dish for supper as I fumbled with my laces, daintily dancing on the tiny mat to prevent tracking in dirt. (2/21/2006)
- John’s World: Lights, Camera, Auction
Rural America is drenched in drama. Unfortunately, it plays out like a runaway glacier. (1/30/2006)
- John’s World: Predictions for 2006
Experts say that the past is the best predictor of the future. But, heck, they said that last year. My theory is that the future is unknowable, just like the present. (12/28/2005)