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January 2013 Archive for Late-Night Laughs

RSS By: A Good Laugh

Enjoy some good one-liners and bits from your favorite late-night comedians.

Who Should Be on the Trillion-Dollar Coin?

Jan 14, 2013

Conan O'Brien: "Tickets to President Obama's inauguration have sold out. At least that's what the President is telling Joe Biden."

Jimmy Fallon: "The President's team is promising special perks for donors who give at least a million dollars to the inauguration. Which is cool, but you know what else can get you a lot of perks? Keeping that million dollars."

David Letterman: "We're $20 trillion in debt, so somebody at the Treasury department says that what we'll do is print a coin for a trillion dollars. I've seen a prototype. It has a beautiful profile of Regis Philbin."

Stephen Colbert: "What do you put on a trillion-dollar coin? I'll tell what you it should be, those Charmin bears -– because when you pull an idea like this out of your ass, you're going to need something soft."

 

Jimmy and Jay Rip into the 113th Congress

Jan 08, 2013

Jimmy Fallon: "Today, members of the 113th Congress were sworn in at the Capitol. After which, they were like, 'Well, that's enough work for the year.'"

Jay Leno: "This week Congress approved some version of the fiscal tax bill, which raises taxes on rich Americans. President Obama was determined to do this right away –- while there are still some rich Americans left."

David Letterman: "Al-Jazeera has purchased Al Gore's old TV network, Current TV. And listen to this: $500 million. This is a little something Al Gore has come up with called 'global fleecing.'"

Jay Leno: "The National Journal says Joe Biden may be the most influential vice president in history. Is that really a compliment? Isn’t that like being the tallest hobbit?"

 

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