Jul 30, 2014
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Late-Night Laughs

RSS By: A Good Laugh

Enjoy some good one-liners and bits from your favorite late-night comedians.

Jay on the Primary Winners and the BP CEO

Jun 11, 2010
Jay Leno: "Women won big in California, Arkansas, Nevada and South Carolina. These are exciting times. I can remember when only rich white men could buy elections. Now women can buy them, too."

Jay Leno: "The only commercial airline in Iraq, Iraqi Airways, folded this week. The CEO of Iraqi Airlines said the company could not survive in a market where everybody in the country is on the no-fly list."

Jay Leno: "The new unemployment figures are not good. A lot of people out of work, yet somehow the CEO of British Petroleum still manages to keep his job."

Jay Leno:  "President Obama said today he would've fired BP CEO Tony Hayward if he worked for him. But unfortunately, as you know, the White House works for BP."

Jay Leno:  "Tony Hayward said he would just like to get his life back. He wants to get his life back. You know, I say give him life plus 20."

Jimmy Fallon: "The Coast Guard says that BP is now catching up to 630,000 gallons of oil a day. The bad news is that they're capturing it with ducks."
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