Jay Leno: "In an interview, President Obama said if there's one thing he's learned, it's that you can't change Washington from within. So what is he saying — that if we want real change, we should throw him out?"
Seth Meyers: "Obama joked that Bill Clinton, who has been campaigning for him, should be appointed to the role of Secretary of Explaining Stuff. Hey, you know what's another good name for that position? President."
Jay Leno: "Political pundits are taking Mitt Romney to task, saying his latest gaffe was not 'presidential.' Vice presidential, sure. That's Joe Biden territory."
Stephen Colbert (on complaints that Romney is too vague about his plans): "What are they talking about? Romney has given some very specific figures. For instance, he is willing to piss off exactly 47% of the voters."