Jay Leno: "Mitt Romney said last week that he learned something. There are things that money can't buy — like Colorado, Minnesota, Missouri."
Jay Leno: "It was a bad week for Newt Gingrich. In terms that Newt can understand, I think the voters told him they want to start seeing other candidates."
Jimmy Fallon: "This Saturday is the drawing for one of the biggest Powerball jackpots in history, which means one lucky winner could be worth $300 million. Or as Mitt Romney calls that, ‘middle class.’"
Jimmy Fallon: "Apple is facing a $38 million fine in China because the word 'iPad' is trademarked by a Chinese company. Apple was nervous about owing money to China — but then Obama was like, ‘Ah, you get used to it.’"