Overloaded with Stress? Don’t Go It Alone. A ‘Farm Counselor’ Can Help
After 30 years working in the field of rural mental health, Ted Matthews understands the factors that stress farmers – and there are a lot. Earlier this week, he ticked off four recent ones in quick succession during a brief interview on Agri-Talk.
“Tornadoes, avian (bird) flu, corn and soybean crops that are average at best…and we aren’t getting enough rain in most areas right now,” says Matthews, director of Minnesota Rural Mental Health, Hutchinson, Minn.
“Prices for everything are going up, so what are (input costs) going to be next year? That’s another stress farmers are going to be looking at in the very near future,” Matthews told Davis Michaelsen, Agri-Talk guest host.
The worst stresses, he says, are usually those things farmers can’t address or change – the weather that doesn’t cooperate or equipment that breaks down and can’t be fixed quickly because the technician is already booked up.
When farmers get upset, their frustration often turns inward and then also spills out in the form of angry words on their immediate family members and loved ones.
How can you get ahold of volatile emotions and turn what can be so damaging into something benign? Here are three recommendations:
First, you need to be self-aware. Stop and think about what you’re feeling and why before you engage your mouth.
“I always tell people when it comes to your IQ, it drops 50 points when you’re angry. When people get really angry, they’re good at using four-letter words but eight-letter words never come out of their mouth,” he says.
Second, ask your spouse or a close friend if there’s a problem.
“Are you talking fast and loud? Are you verbally lashing out? As farmers, we forget what we’ve said 5 minutes after we blow off steam, but the person we lashed out at will never forget,” Matthews says. “There are consequences when we do that.”
An apology is often not worth much to the recipient of your anger—especially if you’ve lashed out in anger before, he explains.
“We may see life going right back to normal, but that person probably doesn’t” Matthews says.
Third, consider how to address frustrations that get out of hand or are reoccurring. Eating right, exercising and getting sufficient sleep are always good practices to adopt and that protect mental well-being.
Consider calling a counselor like Matthews to talk through your specific issues and make a plan on how to address the issues that weigh on you mentally. More information on Matthews is available at www.farmcounseling.org
Listen to the full discussion Matthews has with Davis Michaelsen on Agri-Talk here:
