Jay Leno: “And at his trial this week, the Iraqi journalist...who threw his shoes” at former President George W. Bush “said he rehearsed the attack for two years.” Well, “how embarrassing is that? Guy practiced for two years and he still missed?
Jay Leno: “I talked to one of my old high school buddies the other day. ... He did something so stupid. Apparently, he bought a house he could afford. He really should have bought one twice as big and let the taxpayers” take care of it. But “he was living within his means. What an idiot.”


